Matt Keough's Blog

Matt Keough's Blog Humor You may be a birder if…

You may be a birder if…

It was Jeff Foxworthy’s birthday yesterday. Those who consider themselves superior to rednecks will sneer. The joke is on them. Mr. Foxworthy is one smart dude and an author of one of my favorite children’s books “Dirt On My Shirt“.

In homáge to the concept and in recognition of the Fall migration I offer “You Might Be A Birder If…”

  1. You take binoculars when fishing.
  2. The possibility that you will tap your brakes to get a better look at a bird on the wing is very real
  3. You worry that your insurance agent reads your blog posts
  4. You get a little lump in your throat when your wife texts you that she thinks she saw a (fill in the blank) at the feeder
  5. You are glad you do not have a corner office with a window because you know you would never get any work done
  6. If you get a corner office you install a bird feeder, then blinds. Face it, you are conflicted
  7. It is perfectly normal to keep a year list on your Google Drive because it can be accessed in the field from your smart phone or from your desktop wgullhen you get back home and have had the opportunity to cross check your reference materials
  8. You die a little bit if you catch yourself saying “seagull”
  9. You think the girls at the Ed Sullivan Show were a little bit over the top at Elvis but your would understand if it were Kenn Kauffman
  10. When you hear “Birds of a feather flock together.” you think “Well, in most cases, but not always.”
  11. You were asked to take pictures of your son’s birthday party but the boy to bird ratio heavily favors the birds
  12. No new projects at work can be due in April or October. There are more important things that must be attended to
  13. You want to invent a time machine only because you want to stop the guy who introduced the EUST to the United States
  14. You didn’t have to look up the banding abbreviation for European Starling (I did)

In all honesty I do not consider myself a birder. I’m not that committed. I don’t see my lists as a competitive pursuit. I simply enjoy observing the endless variety, beauty and complexity of nature. I hope if you do see yourself in any of the items on my list you will see we are kindred spirits and allow a smile.

Happy birding!

1 thought on “You may be a birder if…”

  1. Dave says:

    You look up if someone yells “duck!”
    You have a life list of birds you’ve seen on bathroom wall paper
    You describe the strange sound your car makes as “Sounds like a BAWW [Black-and-White Warbler]”
    You take your binoculars to a wedding

Comments are closed.

TopBack to Top